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Scientists studying flirting claim to have learned what men and ladies want


Scientists claim to have learned the key to successful flirting.

While some people succeed at flirting, others fail spectacularly in terms of chatting someone up.

But a study by a team of researchers in Norway has found women want men who’re generous and committed, while humour is the strongest flirting weapon for everybody.

Men apparently prefer a girl who appears sexually available and laughs at their jokes.

“What’s only is determined by your gender and whether the aim of the flirtation is a long-term or short-term relationship,” said Leif Edward Ottesen Kennair, a professor on the Norwegian University of Science and Technology’s (NTNU) Department of Psychology.

Prof Kennair belongs to a research group that has studied flirting in Norway and the USA and what people consider are effective tactics – and for whom and in what context.

The research group got here from NTNU and from Bucknell University in Pennsylvania and State University of Recent York at Oswego.

“Flirting involves different signals that folks send to one another. It’s done to draw potential partners,” said Prof Kennair.

“Men and ladies each flirt to get the eye of a desired partner, and maybe to realize a sexual or romantic result from it.”

Co-author T Joel Wade, a presidential professor of psychology at Bucknell University, added: “Flirting may be done verbally in addition to non-verbally.”

Women who just need a short-lived fling from flirting have to signalise this clearly to the potential partner, based on the study.

Friendly contact like hugging or a kiss on the cheek doesn’t work in that context.

“People consider signals that you simply’re sexually available to be essentially the most effective for ladies who’re searching for a short-term relationship,” said Prof Kennair.

A very different tactic works in one other mating context, nevertheless.

The study found women want someone who’s funny and generous, while men prefer someone who appears sexually available and laughs at their jokes

(Getty Images/iStockphoto)

The study shows “signs of generosity and a willingness to commit works best for men who’re searching for a long-term relationship,” said Professor Mons Bendixen, one other co-author.

Men who wish to keep a partner for an extended time frame, perhaps for all times, shouldn’t come across as stingy, ungenerous or as someone who prefers to vary partners incessantly, the researchers said.

But essentially the most powerful weapon within the flirtation arsenal is humour, which is claimed to almost at all times works to a point for everybody.

“People think that humour, or having the ability to make one other person laugh, is only for men who’re searching for a long-term relationship,” said Prof Kennair.

“It’s least effective for ladies who’re searching for a one-night stand – but laughing or giggling at the opposite person’s jokes is an efficient flirtation tactic for each sexes.”

“It isn’t only effective to be funny, but for ladies it is rather vital that you simply show your potential partner that you’re thinking that they’re funny,” Professor Rebecca Burch, a co-author from SUNY Oswego, US, added.

The researchers suggested humour was something everyone should put of their flirting toolkit – but perhaps shouldn’t start with it.

“Smiling and eye contact are vital,” said Prof Kennair. “You then can construct your flirting skills from that base, using more advanced tactics.”

The scientists found flirting was largely the identical within the US and Norway.

Flirting is simply culturally dependent to a lesser extent, corresponding to in people’s body language, the initial contact and within the degree of generosity, they said.

This means that effective flirting is essentially universal which isn’t surprising because the motivations for locating a mate are partly biological, said Prof Wade.

Nevertheless, this also shows that folks nice tune their flirting techniques depending on what’s emphasised of their culture, which is a brilliant, flexible strategy, Prof Burch added.

The researchers surveyed near 1,000 students in Norway and the USA.

The participants rated how effective 40 various kinds of flirting were for a long-term or a short-term relationship, and whether the flirter was male or female. Participants were randomly assigned to the 4 versions of the questionnaire.

The researchers took under consideration the participants’ extroversion, age, religiosity, how willing the person was to have a relationship and “mate value”, that’s, how attractive you’re within the dating market.

“Individual differences in age, religiosity, extroversion, personal attractiveness and preferences for short-term sexual relationships had little or no effect on how effective respondents considered the varied flirting tactics to be,” said Prof Bendixen.

Our personality may due to this fact seem like less relevant in how we make judgments of the flirting behaviour in others.

“Nevertheless, we do consider that non-public characteristics affect the sort of flirting people employ themselves,” he added.

The study was published within the journal Evolutionary Psychology.

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